Some of you may have been on courses where the trainer stands at the front of the room at the start of the course and says, "You are going to have such fun today." And you may have found yourself thinking, "Oh no, I’m not."

Telling people what their experiences are going to be can be dangerous. Often people react against such bald statements in a way that impacts adversely on their training experience.

The statement "you are going to have such fun today" is actually fraught with dangerous assumptions. For example, what does the word fun imply in this context? Do the trainer and the participants even share a common definition of that word? If not, is the trainer referring to their definition of fun or what the participants think may be fun? And how does the trainer know that this will be something the group will all experience?

In making this statement, the trainer has actually shared with the participants what she believes the group will experience today. It is fantastic the trainer feels this way, but the words she has chosen may end up working against what she hopes will happen.

The potential problem lies in the trainer placing her expectations on the participants. They have been given something to push against. Suppose someone in the group is not enjoying the training experience. He may think back to the statement. Obviously the trainer does not know what she is talking about. If she doesn’t know what she talking about in this situation, what else is she pretending to know? As a result, the trainer’s credibility may begin to diminish in the eyes of the participant.

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So for the trainer, it might be more effective if she suggests the experience. This allows them the freedom to create their own responses to the event. She might have said, "Today’s course could turn out to be one of the more enjoyable training experiences you have had in a while."

This suggesting statement tends to plant a suggestion as to how the participants might view the training experience. In many cases it’s better to simply sow the seeds of what might happen rather than pressure the group to meet the trainer’s expectation. Participants are now invited to create their own reaction to the experience, possibly influenced in a positive way by the trainer’s words.

Here are a couple of examples of how to convert a tell format into a suggest format.

"You’ll find this to be an incredibly useful tool."
"You may find this to be a useful tool in certain situations."

"This is the most important idea in the entire course."
"You may find this to be one of the most important ideas in the entire course."

©2000-2004 Dr Rich Allen